Apology

God,
I am sorry, Lord.
For once again, I've turned from you.
Why do I let myself get distracted,
to dwell with the things of this world?
My time with you gives me such joy and peace,
yet I trade it for disappearing pleasure.
Why can't I just focus on you?
My heart's desire is to be close to you,
but my nature within keeps struggling to win.

God,
you are more than I could ever comprehend,
yet I try to fit you into my box of limited understanding.
I try to shrink you, in order to feel like I can control you,
all the while, struggling to make sense,
of the war raging inside of me,
between my sinful nature and who you have created me to be.

O God,
you have given me deliverance,
and broken my chains,
yet I find myself putting them back on,
even when I don't want them to be.

God,
I'm sorry,
for this is not what I want to be.

God,
grant my heart, peace, so I can rest in you.
grant my soul, joy, so I can rejoice with your creation.
grant me your love, so other may see Your love,
grant me strength, so my life can be built on the Rock that remains

Send

God surveys the world below,
searching for the one's who will go.
To seek the lost and heal the broken,
feed the hungry and serve the poor.
He sends the Spirit to find the one's
who will heed his call and leave it all.

The Spirit goes to the most obvious place,
where people gather to worship and praise.
The Spirit sends them a message of God's love and grace,
and shows them the need of the world in pain,
The people eagerly get out their checkbooks and ask "how much?"
Yet the Spirit replies, "It is not money I seek.
I am searching for the one's who are willing to go."

Some ignore the Spirit's calling and write big checks,
and leaving feeling good for the difference their money will make.
Others frown and turn away,
and as they leave you will hear them say,
"Sorry God, but I don't have the time."
"Sorry God, but I just can't juggle another responsibility."
"Sorry God, but that not part of MY life plan."
"Sorry God, but my life's more important than following you."

The Spirit is saddened,
for the people who say they love God,
do no seem to understand God's love at all.
The cries of broken lives bring tears' to God's eyes,
yet His people are too caught up in their own lives,
to udnerstand the truth of His grace,
by which he saved the human race.

The Spirit roams throughout the land,
searching for the one's who will listen,
to God's voice calling them to a better way of life.
The question is there, "Who will go?"
To step into the lives of others and make a difference.
The Spirit is waiting, will you be the one to respond,
"I am here, Lord. Send ME."

Masquerade

Have you ever been to a Masquerade?
Where people hide behind masks and play.
Let me take you to the Masquerade,
Where the battle of life is daily played.
The masquerade isn't for you or me,
But to catch a glimpse into the depths we must proceed.

Into the building we slowly walk,
Through the big double doors standing guard.
Into the office we must go,
For we must label ourselves to join the flow.
Out the door and down the hall,
Feeling encroached by the metal locker walls.
Stopping ourselves in the crosshairs of battle,
We await our glimpse of the masquerade.
Seconds tick by as we hear the gentle quiet,
Mixed with murmurs of the dance of the masquerade.
Finally, now, the time has come,
A bell rings and the world explodes.
The quiet shattered by voices of the dancers.
Countless bodies flow through that hall,
All dancing the dance of a masquerade ball.
The final number has just begun
And soon their masquerade will be done.

But before the end, my promise I will keep
A glimpse of the masquerade, for your eyes to see.
Stop, look, the queen just walked by
Followed by her minions, she thinks she owns the sky
Her minions follow her beg and call,
For she has power over them all.
Yet if you looked past the mask she's wearing,
You’ll see the pain she bearing.
For powerless she truly feels,
And perfection is her life's ideal.
Control over other's she must have,
To lessen the pain of loneliness inside.
For pity must be given the queen,
For the face under the mask can never been seen.
The fear of rejection of who she really is,
Forces her to constantly dance in the masquerade.

Turn your head, there he is.
The boy strutting like the stud he thinks he is.
Behold the king of the school,
You can tell he thinks he's just so cool.
Followed by his minions and fawned over by girls,
The king looks like he owns the world.
But take a look deeper into the eyes uncovered,
And you'll be surprised to see the pain inside.
For in being the king, you must be a "man"
Yet the ideal that he seeks can never be reached,
For the ideal "man" is but just a myth of society,
Forcing boys to kill their feelings.
The king must become someone he's not,
In order to keep his powerful spot.
Yet, the king must be pitied, along with the queen,
For the mask can never be removed while on the scene.
For if the mask was removed, everyone would see,
The king isn't the person he's supposed to be.
So all the King can do is dance in the masquerade,
And in the confines of his bedroom, where no one can see,
Shed the tears of pain and cry himself to sleep.

A few more examples and we will depart,
For the masquerade is almost over for the day.
There go the jokers and the clowns,
The ones who cover up their frowns,
And entertain everyone around,
For the attention makes their joy abound.
This bit of attention in the masquerade,
Is the only thing that gets them through the day.

Now, one's focus must turn to the saddest ones,
For they never got to choose the mask that they wore.
The outcasts, troublemakers, misfits and loners,
Labeled and masked by the royalty and minions.
Look beyond the mask they are forced to wear,
And you'll see the silent tears of pleading.
Wanting to be rid of the masks,
To choose for themselves who they are supposed to be.

Then there's the biggest group of them all,
The content in who they claim to be.
Yet even those have fears inside,
Of letting anyone see who he or she really are.

The tragic story of the masquerade,
Is one that is played out everyday.
All children learn to dance and play,
On the battlefield of the masquerade.
Freedom and truth are barely found,
For those without masks do not abound.

Do you now remember your masquerade?
The one where you danced and played.
Hiding behind masks who you really are,
Just to be part of the fakeness around.

Walk the halls of the masquerade,
Where the children dance and play.
Yet look behind the masks that they wear,
And reach out to who is really there.

Thoughts

Have you ever stopped and wondered in the midst of the going,
where you are coming from and where you are going to?
Are you so caught up in the next to do,
that you forget who you are and who you want to be?
Society's screaming, faster... faster...
the more you have to do, the more you are fulfilled.
How did we ever get caught up in the lie,
that life is about having the busiest schedule?
What ever happened to the moments,
of a child sitting in quiet awe of the world around?
Wake up, open your eyes,
cause all you're seeing is the world blurring by
Slow down, take a look,
for all you're doing is running from the loneliness inside.
Rest, be silent,
go against the urge and understand yourself.
For the truth of understanding cannot be found
In the midst of the going.
Only in quiet will you ever hear,
the whisper of wholeness.

Twelve

Have you ever wondered,
what it would be like to be twelve in 2006?
Do you believe that things are much different,
from the time you were twelve?
Let's take a journey and listen to the walls,
who hold the secrets of those who are twelve.
The walls speak of a time always changing,
of mood swings, hormones, growing and thinking.
Our ears bombarded by unheard cries of the hurt,
caused by cliques, gossips, bullying, and mean words.
The walls echo with the sound of planning,
how to ruin a girl who doesn't know her place.
The ridicule, dirty looks, backstabbing and abandonment,
all signs of a girls unwantedness.
The stories continue, the saga unfolds,
of the constant battle of those who are twelve.

Do you hear the cries of those who are twelve,
who try to live like society tells.
Be a "man" or "woman" they are constantly reminded,
yet even though they strive, the goal is beyond them.
Told to fit inside the box of which no on can fit,
the twelve’s daydream of all the what if's.
For in the process of cramming into the box,
the twelves are realizing all that they've lost.
The box, you see, if just but a dream,
one that disappears the harder you reach.
When you find that the box has vanished,
you'll find a twelve who's dead inside.
Society says to those who are twelve,
being yourself is not allowed.
Kill your emotions, obsess about your weight,
money makes you happy, isn't society great.
Power is everything, shortcut are a must,
step on others to raise yourself up.
Do you hear the echoes of those who are twelve,
the secrets held in their school halls?

The battle is raging, each one competes,
for to be number one is all they are told to seek,
Grades are everything, tests determine who you are,
cheating is ok if it gets you an A.
Disconnected, alone and afraid,
the twelves are all struggling to find a way.
Some do better for guidance they have ,
from adults who's love tell them to be who they are.
The battle is fought day to day,
but the focus is on learning and getting an A.
The healthy development of life is threatened,
in the school halls of those who are twelve.

Would you feel safe in these halls if you were twelve?
Where the stories are lived and the tears are shed.
We cannot change our age or go back in time,
but steps into the halls of those who are twelve,
And show them THE LOVE to guide their way.

Banquet

The call goes out throughout the land,
For the King’s banquet is at hand.
All who hear are invited to come near,
And partake of the banquet of grace.
Come dine on the everlasting feast,
Of love that will put your soul at peace.
Come as you are, in your rags or your riches,
Whether you live in mansions or dirty ditches.
Will you join in the rejoicing,
Of those who have found life’s great blessing?

All are welcome, the price is paid,
By the King’s only son, who obeyed,
The wishes of his loving father,
To make your suffering no longer.
Come feast upon the bread and cup,
Over which the son broke and bled,
His own life, a sacrifice he made,
For the sake of you, the ones who are invited.

The King’s banquet is at hand,
The doors open, the table set,
Will you accept your invitation,
to this banquet of grace?

Hear

Have you ever stopped,
In the midst of busyness,
To open your ears and hear,
The sound of creation’s chorus.
The rhythm of the beating rain,
Which praises your Holy name.
The symphony of the stars above,
Basking in your heavenly love.
The dancing of the swaying trees,
Proclaiming all your mighty deeds.
The crashing of the ocean waves,
Performing for the one who saves.
The harmony of earth and seas,
Resounding thanks for He who fills needs.
The silent awe of the rocks around,
Praising of your joy abound.
The trumpeting of the smallest flower,
Reminding us of your amazing power.
The melody of the angels from high,
Singing praise for the one who chose to die.
The singing of all you’ve made,
Acknowledging the peace you gave.

Lord, may my voice join,
With creation’s chorus,
To cry of my love for you,
And thank you for all that you do.
May this small gift that I bring,
Cause your angels louder to sing.
I pour out my heart in the silence,
When I open my ears and hear creation’s praises to you.

Complacency

Is it ever going to change?
Day to day,
It’s all just the same.
Waking light to sleeping night,
Moving around without a fight.
Moment to moment,
Like a dream,
Reality becomes complacency.
Colors disappear, emotions fade,
And all that’s left is the day to day.
Living like a robot,
Present yet disconnected.
Is this really how it is supposed to be?

What ever happened,
To the me who was free,
Of the burdens I now feel?
I once knew Joy,
That could not be contained,
Yet now it seems like a dream,
To good to be true.

Dream

Life as a dream,
Moving unseen.
From place to place,
Solely focused on the race.
To gain the world,
Yet forfeit the soul.

To grab hold,
Of all the spoils,
While trampling upon
The heads of the weak,
In order to cover up,
Our own brokenness.

Life as a dream,
Moving unseen.
Is this the dream,
We were created to see?

Midst of the Quiet

In the midst of the quiet,
I hear a gentle whisper,
Tugging at my soul,
Who’s longing for a home.
I strain my ears
To catch the speaking breeze,
And grasp peaceful words,
Spoken just to me.

“You are mine and mine alone,
and I will never let you go,
for I formed you with my bare hands,
my child so perfectly formed.
I created you with a purpose,
A life, a goal, a dream,
And if you ever feel lost in the moment,
Just open your ears and listen for me,
In the midst of the quiet.”

Turbulence

O God,
What’s wrong with me,
Why can’t I be the person you created me to be?
Why do I turn so far,
From what my heart knows is right?
Turbulent rapids cannot compare,
To the war raging inside of me.
The things I’ve held,
Has caused me to walk away,
From the love of a God so pure.
The struggles of living life,
The way I know is right,
Has taken its toll and left me…
Weary and torn.

I long to walk in your pasture of rest,
Along the river of peace,
Drink deep of the fountain of grace,
And be made whole once again.

O Lord, God of Wonder and Might,
Forgive me for walking the path of selfishness,
Help me back to the way of righteousness,
Teach me of your law and justice,
Bring me closer to You.

Wandering

A wandering mind,
Loses sight of the Holy,
Searching endlessly,
for the right path to travel.
How could I have known,
Which way to travel to you,
If not for your love,
Lighting the path at my feet.
Why do I wander,
Even though you show me the way?
Why do I stumble,
When I see the path that I walk?
Why do I walk away,
Even though you’re my only hope?
How strong is my faith,
When my words are not acting?
How strong is my hope,
When I do not turn to you?
How strong is my love,
When I walk away from yours?

Praise

Lord,
How I long to sing of you glory.
To join the chorus of creation, crying out, “Majesty,”
And chant with the drumming waves about your love.
To dance with the swaying leaves in praise of your presence,
And stand in awe with the mountains over your power.
To burn like the sun with passion for your will,
And fall before you like the rain in honor of your mercy.

God of wonders, God who creates, God who loves,
May my heart burn for your presence.
May my soul long for your will be done.
May my mind reflect on the power of your Word,
And may my actions be pleasing to You in all that I do.

Real

What is this I’m feeling inside,
The way your presence makes me feel?
You laugh chases away the rain,
You eyes say things will be ok.
You taught me how to laugh once again,
And brought back my hidden smile.
It’s been so long since I’ve felt so free,
Of the sadness that has burdened me.
Words could never express what I feel inside,
But this dream is actually real.

Longing

How I long,
To get past these walls,
To be able to look into your eyes
And see your heart.
Finding out who you really are,
Behind the masks you wear.
I want to know,
What makes you tick.
Where God is in your life,
And where your passions lie.
Who you are on the inside,
That is what I want to see.
Looking past the outward signs,
And see you for who you really are.
What has God done in your life?
Where has he been real?
What does God mean to you
And how does that show through in your life.

Holding

What is this thing inside of me,
Not letting me be who I want to be?
What’s holding me back,
From sharing my life with you?
What is this wall in front of me,
Which I can’t seem to get through?
I think I’ve found,
This fear inside of me.
Shattered feelings from the past,
Buried beneath thick glass.
Scars that remind me,
Of the pain I once felt.
I look around and I can feel,
This fear stirring inside of me.
Can I trust you?
I don’t know
For some,
I have no place to put it.
It’s holding me back,
Not being able to trust.

Desire

What’s going on inside of me?
It’s so hard to understand.
The swirls of emotion and thought,
Keeps my mind constantly going.
Your peace within is what I desire
To keep my mind focused on you

Your joy keeps me lifted up,
When the world around doesn’t make any sense.
You give me Your strength,
When all mine is gone.

You have done so much for me,
To make my life what it is today.
Many times you have lifted me out of my pit,
And placed my feet upon solid ground.
When I focus my eyes upon you,
All my trials seem to fade away.
The work of your Spirit within me
continues to forge me into who you want me to be.

Lord, search my heart
And hear its desires.
The longing to be constantly near you,
To be in your presence all of my days.
Having a mind always focused on you,
Oh, what joy that will be.

Lord, God, take all of me,
Continue to mold me into who you want me to be.
My life is useless in my own hands,
But in yours can make a difference.
A tool for you,
Is what I want to be.
To grow in your Spirit,
And help those in need.
To put aside myself,
And focus on others.
To give all of me,
To those who are lost.
Lord, I want to be,
All that you have created me to be.
Take my life,
And make it yours.

I lay down my life at the foot of the cross
I pick up my cross to follow you.
To this world, I want to be dead,
So that a true life in you, I can live
I pray that my every breathe,
Will bring glory and honor to your name.

Brick Wall

What do I do when my words seem to hit brick walls,
No matter how hard I try, frustration chokes me.
A heavy burden falls upon my shoulder.
My own strength and patience fail me,
My own means, just lead to disaster
Oh Lord, All I seem to do is mess up.
I cannot do this on my own,
For I have already tried and failed.

Grant me the patience, Oh Lord,
To show these guys your love.
Speak through me, give me the words to say,
That will pierce their longing hearts,
And reveal to them what is missing in their lives.
Oh, Lord, I see myself reflected in these guys,
And all I want to do is love them like you do
To be a true friend, which I barely had
I want to share with them all that you have done for me
Because without you, there would not be me.
Hard times lie ahead for these guys
And I don’t want to see them go it alone.

Lord, I pray that you will use me in their lives,
To be the presence of your love,
And in being part of their lives, may your name be glorified.

Lord, give me strength
For my strength is already gone
Fill me with your joy
For my burdens are wearing me down.
Lord, let your name be glorified,
In all that I do for you.

Inside of You

What’s going on inside of you,
Changing who you are?
What’s burdening your heart,
The invisible weighing you down?
I can see the turmoil inside of you,
It is all over your face you know.
In your eyes I see the pain,
But I don’t understand it’s cause.
It hurts me so much inside,
To be a spectator on this painful ride.
Tears well inside,
When I see the joy missing from your life.
When your smile fades away,
There so much I wish I could say.
I wish I could take that burden from your back,
To take your pain and make it mine.
Yet that power I do not possess,
To soothe your soul and give you peace.
But I do know of someone who,
Can do all the things I wish I could do.
He’s done it for me,
So I know he’ll do it for you.
Let go of what’s holding you down,
And lay it at the feet of Jesus.
Give all your cares to him,
and he’ll set you free from your burden.
He’s always going to be there for you,
And he’s never, ever, going to leave you.

Bring It

One after another,
Silent blows assault my body,
Trying to make me stumble,
And turn my heart from your presence.
My body begins to ache,
But I still struggle after you.

Blow after blow,
I feel the pain coursing through me,
But I’m not going to give in.
I’m not going to turn away from you,
That choice already made,
I continue to strive toward you.

You never said that this would be easy,
There was no promise of a gentle path.
Why should I turn away when the world is against me,
Where the neverending blows try to break me.
For the promise that I hold onto,
Is the promise of You.

You are my strength in the midst of weakness,
You are my direction when I feel lost.
You are my hope when all seems hopeless.
You are my life when death surrounds me.
You are the promise I long to hold onto.
For you alone are worth the cost.

I call out to my assailants,
“Bring it on,”
For if you are for me,
Then it doesn’t matter who’s against me.
You will guide me through this fight,
Like you have done so many times before.

Follow

What can I do now,
That the road ahead is pitch black.
Everything that I once held certain,
Has crumbled around me,
And I find myself, alone,
Staring into the darkness ahead.

I feel hurt,
As I shed tears of sorrow,
Yet deep down inside,
I knew what to do.
I call out your name,
And in the silence that follows,
I hear you whispering, “Follow me.”
Turning toward your voice,
I take a step into the void of the night.
Another step I take, not caring what lies ahead.
I focus on your voice and walk into the darkness, saying,
“I will follow you Lord, no matter what the cost.”

Courage to Face

Lord, this fear inside of me,
Is holding me back from who you want me to be.
I tremble at the thought of the past,
Of all the mistakes I have made.
Will people see past the masks that I wore,
To see the person I am today.

Lord, I don’t know how to let this go,
For this is where you’re telling me to be.
I don’t want to keep living with this fear,
But the mysterious unknown lies ahead.

Lord, give me the strength to face this fear,
The courage to walk the road ahead.
For even if my world shatters around me,
I know you’re always going to be here.

Trust

All the things of the past,
Lead me back to this one place.
You walking towards me on the sea.
I hear you calling out my name,
I yearn to be with you walking on those waves.
I take a step and there I stand,
Gazing at your mighty hand.
Beckoning me to come to you,
For that is what I want to do.
A few more steps and now I see
You loving eyes staring right at me.
Yet my eyes lose focus and I begin to tremble,
For now I see all those waves rushing right at me
I start to sink and I cry for help
And at once you are there to rescue me.
You take me back to the shore,
And comfort me with your warm embrace.

The journey I have taken thus far,
Has led me to these shores so many times.
And each time I get closer to where you walk,
But then my trust begins to crumble and I start to sink.
Yet I know that one day I’ll make it to you,
But it is something only you can help me do.
For I alone do not have the strength to make it,
But your spirit at work within will help me to reach you.
When that day comes, I know I will rejoice,
For it is then that I will be able to give myself fully to you.

Restless

With loneliness abound, my soul begins to stir,
Restless with a yearning to be free of this fear.
A fear so entrenched into the core of who I am,
That its coming bring with it memories of the years gone by.

How did I make it through those years of torment?
As this feeling covered my soul and made me feel alive yet empty.
The sorrow and bliss, which gave my life meaning,
Blinded my eyes from the truth hidden within.
But I was led to the truth and it set my soul free,
For I found You in the depths of my heart,
And taking a hold of your outstretched hand, You lifted me up out of my pit.

But even now, as each passing moment strengthens the desire of my soul,
The feeling once again has taken control.
The voices I long to hear are whispers lost in the wind.
The faces I long to see are beyond the horizon, out of sight.
Into the pit, I once again begin to fall.

Why have I let my soul be emptied of the great joy that you bring?
You brought me life yet I have decided not to seek you .
I walk in the path, which you have chosen for me,
But I thought myself clever and choose to take the lead.

Why O Lord, did I not put my trust in you?
Around ever turn it seems that I try to take control.
To let go of your hand that was leading me and strike out on my own.
My pride led me straight to this pit,
Which I longed never to see.
I thought I could make it, trying on my own,
But I find myself falling deeper into this pit I fear.

My arms are flailing wildly as my soul begins to cry,
Weeping,
Knowing what sorrow lies within the darkness.
I thought I could make it, trying on my own,
Yet now surrounded by darkness, I plunged into despair.

In that moment.
I realized my mistake.
I cried out to you,
Hoping you were close enough to hear.
Yet even before the words left my lips,
I felt your hand grab hold of mine,
And gently pulled me out of my pit.

You greeted me with a warm embrace,
And wiped the tears from my eyes.
In my shame, the only words I could muster were, “I’m sorry,”
Yet, as I looked into your loving eyes,
I knew you had already forgiven me.

O Lord, you knew me before I was born,
You know my weaknesses as well as my strengths.
Yet, you choose to look past these faults of mine,
And gaze into the core of my soul
To see that it yearns for you.

Back in your presence,
My restless soul begins to rejoice,
For once again you have saved me from myself.

That pit I wish never to fall into,
Yet I do not know what lies ahead.
All I know is that I walk with my Savior leading the way,
He will keep me steady along the way,
As long as I hold the hand that guides me and not try to go it alone.

Lost Dream

A dream that is lost when I wake,
Of Joy that the world cannot take.
For all around the world pulls me down,
Leaving me no strength to pick myself off the ground.
Is there more to this life,
Then the pain that I feel?
My dreams tell me so,
But I just don’t know

One day I cried out your name,
While I was drowning in my own shame.
Since that day, the dream became reality.
Joy found me and lifted me from my frailty.
Broke my chains,
Real life I gained.

Keeping my eyes on you I have found,
That the world can no longer weight me down.
I feel alive like I have never felt before,
Because my sins, you chose to bore.

Bliss

What gives life meaning,
When everything seems to pull you down?
Darkness surrounds you,
As happiness fades away.
Through your eyes everything looks burdened,
With nothing in sight to lift the weight.
How did things get this way,
Going through life with no reason to smile.
Trying to keep it all inside,
Not wanting other to see what I hide.
These feelings buried deep within,
Fester, with no way for me to win.
Pain, what a gift!
Letting me feel like I am alive.
Can I be freed from this bliss?
To be alive in ways more than this.

Surrender

Lord, I am unable,
To do anything on my own.
These hands of mine,
Are always messing up.
All I want to do,
Is to make something for you,
To bring a glimmer to your eye.
The more I try by myself,
The less I am able to do.
Can I create this one gift,
To bring a smile to your face.

Lord, I have realized,
The one gift I could bring.
Letting go of all control,
Oh Lord, to thee, I give me.
Work through me, I pray.
Use my hands and feet,
To show my heart’s desire.

Christmas

Up in the sky,
On this night the angels did cry,
“Glory, Glory, to you this night,
A Savior born to end your plight.”

A start shone bright,
For the light,
Brought this one night.
Pointing the way,
To the babe that would lay,
In a manger full of hay.

A babe born to save man,
Following God’s ultimate plan.
As a man he’ll die,
On the cross, he’ll cry,
“Forgive them Father,
for they do not know what they do.”

For the sheep that he led,
His own blood did he shed.
To wash us clean of our sins,
To lead us back to God again.

Up in the sky,
On this night the angels did cry,
“Glory, Glory, to you this night,
A Savior born to end your plight.”

Wish

A mind always focused.
A will constantly seeking.
A heart forever loving.
A soul longing to be close.

This is who I yearn to be,
Forever being near to thee.
To carry my cross and follow you,
To die to myself and be made new.

Lord, to be your servant is what I desire,
For only you can quench my fire.
Lord, you are the only one I truly need,
Because for my sake you choose to bleed.
Washing me white as snow,
In order to bring me back to thee.

Lord, help me to become the man you want me to be,
I’ll lay down my life, if your will be done.
Who will you send, O Lord?
My soul cries out, “Send me.”
Use me to glorify your name,
So in the end, I can be a tool for thee.

Missing

What is this I feel inside?
Never felt this way before.
A yearning from deep within,
A longing for something more.
The cries of a lonely hear,
The searching of an empty soul,
And unshed tears of despair,
Formed inside me this gaping hole.

What can take away the pain?
I have tried all these earthly things,
Only to find the hole still remains,
So in sorrow my soul continues to sing.

In my searching, I came across,
A man they called Jesus,
He brought to the world, love, hope and peace,
And died on a cross to save us.

In him I found the missing piece,
Which made my soul complete,
And at that moment I surrendered,
My every heartbeat.

Shatter

I stand frozen are my life shatters.
Fear invades my mind, burying hope in its darkness.
I’m worn out from fighting this struggle called life.
My strength leaves me my body starts to crumble.
Tears fall as my soul cries out in agony.

Suddenly the darkness fades away,
Warmth fills me, peace flows over me,
Weariness leaves me, joy consumes me,
My fear dwindles as hope shines brighter,
Strength pulses through me as a hand lifts me.

I turn and stare into those loving passionate eyes.
I feel that warm and comforting embrace.
I hear the quiet whisper of reassurance.
I see Jesus holding my hand with compassion written on his face.
I know that he will be with me… Always.

Crossroad

Walking down the dark path of life,
Following a small glimpse of light,
I come up to a fork in the road,
And stop, not knowing which way to go.

I stand and examine the two paths.
Hoping that something will point me in the right direction.
One way calls my name because of its appeal,
While the other looks treacherous and harder to travel.
As I stand and ponder which way to turn,
I realize the light, which has led me this far, has disappeared.

Suddenly, a stranger clad in white walks up beside me
And says, “my son, why are you still standing here?”
I turn to him and say, “Sir, I do not know which way to take,
For one is appealing, but my soul cries out for the other”
The stranger turns to me with a fiery glow in his eyes and says,
“Follow your soul for that is the path you were created to take,
Even when the path becomes difficult to travel,
I will be right by your side helping you take each step.
When you stumble I will help you to regain your balance;
When you’ve fallen and can’t find the strength to get back up;
I’ll be there to give you a hand and the strength to stand.”

I turn to examine the two paths once again and ponder the stranger’s words
But when I look back to give him my answer, he is gone,
All I hear is his reassuring voice in my heart and soul,
“Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.”
So with confidence, I turn back to the fork in the road,
And begin the next part of my journey.

Cry of Despair

Who do I have to be for you to love me?
I’m down on my knees ready to bleed.
The pain that I feel gives my life no appeal.
My hearts been broken in two, oh, what do I have to do?
Hold me tight in your warm embrace, putting my heart back into place.
Fill me with your unchanging love, washing me as white as a dove.
Give me strength to face each hour, Lord, please fill me with your power.
Lift me up when I stumble, and teach me how to be humble.
The price you paid for me, which you made,
You went through all that pain as the Lamb being slain.
On the cross where Jesus died, that truth I cannot deny.
Life was taking its toll, but you made me whole.
You’ve given my life meaning without any deceiving.
In you, I found someone who cares, while the whole world seems to stare.
You are the light in my darkness, leading me on the path of righteousness.
Oh Lord, I’ve made my choice; only to you I lift my voice.

Searching Heart

Oh Lord, where can I turn but to you.
I’ve tried to go it all along, but found myself unable.
Blinded by my pride, I thought I’d make it, only to stumble along the way.
I’ve come to my end, wanting to give in.
Peace become turmoil as joy turns to sorrow.
Life turns darker as hope seems to dim.
Loneliness invades as emptiness swells within.

Lord God, Almighty, hear the cries of my unshed tears
Bring me back to your heart,
Where love, joy, and peace flow like a raging river.
Fill me with your joy that I used to feel.
Fill me with your love that I know is real.
Bring down your peace; fill me with your zeal.
Bring back the hope, which your life revealed.
The desires of my heart, your will be done.
Life everlasting, love unchanging, grace unwavering
Fill me with your Spirit, Light me on fire,
Touch me with your awesome power.
Purify me, refine me, mold me,
Make me who you want me to be.
I am empty, Oh Lord, please fill my cup

Lost Hope

As tears start welling in the eyes of the hurt,
Thoughts of brokenness leave the heart torn.
Memories of happiness fade away into darkness,
Shadows of a face, linger,
Just out of reach of an outstretched hand.
The realization hits, the body crumbles,
While passing of a voice never to be heard.
The soul weeps, the body trembles,
For the touch of one so dear.
As the eyes open revealing the emptiness inside,
A faint breath is released.
Cries of the heart dissolve into the quiet of the night,
As consciousness slips away into the deep of the mind.